Bananas in Syrup!
Recently I was taking a trip to Thailand, while in the airport a massive family of skangers arrive into the airport, one screamin "Maggie, Maggie take the bleedin' baby outta the bleedin' buggy, she's pissin' all over the bananas!"
Overheard by Marie, Dublin Airport
Posted on Monday, 03rd April 2006
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Rating score (311) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Latvian Latin
My 21 year old younger brother and his mates were talking on Saturday night about how some people were taught the Latin language in school years ago (me included) when one of his mates decided that it must be great for the Latvians over here to be able to speak their own language.
Overheard by Anthony, Donaghmede
Posted on Monday, 03rd April 2006
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Rating score (175) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Arm warmers?
While in a pub in fairview at the weekend, my friend approached the bar to buy a round. At the bar sat the usuall middle-aged alcoholics and as my friend stood beside one of them to order, the middle-aged alco leans over to him and says:
"I had this jacket......it was the best jacket in the world....it had buttons around each shoulder and you could take the sleves off.....I went to the toilet in here before and left it on the stool..when i came back someone had robbed it!.......I still have the sleves tho!!!!!"
Overheard by Stephen, Fairview
Posted on Monday, 03rd April 2006
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Rating score (268) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
too much info thanks ;-0
I was waiting for the bus from busaras to go to the airport and the city link bus which is supposed to be very regular hadn't appeared in over 30 minutes. When I eventually got on the bus I had raised my voice over the traffic to ask the bus driver "how regular is he?" (no sooner had I said it I knew it came out wrong) to which he replied "at least once a day."
Overheard by kl, busaras
Posted on Monday, 03rd April 2006
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Rating score (235) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Coming off bread
Two sales assistants discussing what to get for their lunch, first girl says to her mate: "I'm trying to give up bread, its bad for me." The second girl replies: "yer dead right, I was reading the ingredients on a packet of bread the other day, its full of bleeding addictives!"
Overheard by Sinead, Clothes Shop
Posted on Monday, 03rd April 2006
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Rating score (178) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Your Ma!
On the number 10 route headin into town from the Phoenix Park one morning, there was a group of five lads around the age of 10 goin to school. At Phibsboro four of them got off the packed bus and on their way down the stairs shouted to the one fella left at the back of the bus:
"See ya later Philly..." then they all chanted, "Philly philly little willy!"
Next thing I heard from the back of the bus was Philly shoutin...."Thats not what your ma says!", in his best high pitched little scumbag accent...
Overheard by Sharon, Number 10 route
Posted on Monday, 03rd April 2006
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Rating score (197) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Confusing Graffiti
Not heard but seen.
On corner of O'Connell Street and Abbey Street at the Newsweek stand (used to be Evening Herald stand). Scrawled on side of the stand in large marker is "CUT THE FUCKEN CAKE".
I dont know what the hell that means either but it made me chuckle.
Overheard by Fiona, O'Connell street/abbey street
Posted on Tuesday, 04th April 2006
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Rating score (180) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Skangers Vs D4's
Was coming out of Dundrum Shopping centre on Saturday when three D4 head girls walkin towards me (with the quiffed hairs and the ugg boots). There was a gang of skangers sitting on the wall at the fountain, one of them wolf whistled over at the girls. They giggled and turned around to soak up the praise, but to their obvious dismay, the whistling skanger shouted "wast wistlin' at yous, yiz uglee bitches".
All the skangers fell about the place laughing..... class.
Overheard by David, Dundrum Shopping centre
Posted on Wednesday, 05th April 2006
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Rating score (194) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Receipt not needed
Seen rather than heard, and now matter how often I see it, it always raises a smile.
In dilapidated jacks scrawled on filthy condom machine, down at the bottom, where the gap is to pick up your purchase, is scrawled
INSERT BABY FOR REFUND.
Overheard by dubbelin boyo, The Cobblestone, Smithfield.
Posted on Wednesday, 05th April 2006
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Rating score (215) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Deep-Sea Fishing in the 21st Century
Sitting in 3rd year Geography class, teacher is discussing urbanisation and why a restaurant by a river might get more business than one without a view.
Teacher: "Now say you were in a restaurant beside a river. What might that restaurant have that another somewhere else wouldn't?" (Correct answer: a view)
Supposedly Intelligent Pupil: "SEAFOOD!"
Overheard by Sarz, Junior Cert Geography Class
Posted on Wednesday, 05th April 2006
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Rating score (246) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
How nice
Seen, not heard - Graffiti in Hogans women toilets -
"I sat here,
Broken-hearted,
Tried to shit but
...only farted!"
Overheard by Anonymous, Hogans
Posted on Thursday, 06th April 2006
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Rating score (200) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Shocking girlfriends
Just recently i've started going out with a girl who is usually very mild mannered. When she told me she had just been to the beauticians, i asked "what do you need to go there for? sure your beautiful enough" straight away she replies "to get my flaps waxed"!
Overheard by Barbar, Rathmines
Posted on Thursday, 06th April 2006
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Rating score (229) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Chat up lines from the 80s
Back in the 80's there was a nigthclub in Howth called Saints. One night they ran a Blind Date style competition. One fella was asked what his favourite chat up line was. His reply "how's your arse for lovebites" didn't go down so well with the bouncers and he was chased out of there.
Overheard by Anonymous, Saints nigthclub in Howth (in teh 80's)
Posted on Thursday, 06th April 2006
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Rating score (167) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
