Hungry at work
In McDonalds a few years back i was standing at the counter waiting for the meal i'd ordered.
A young girl about 17 walks up and says to the assistant manager who was serving at the till "ill have a big mac please"
Assistant manager without batting an eyelid proceeds to pick up an unwrapped big mac That was on the counter beside him "Ya know, i think i will too" and proceeds to take a bite out of it.
Overheard by Greg, McDonalds, Kylemore rd
Posted on Saturday, 02nd September 2006
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
Rating score (167) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
The thin white line
My sister was driving to Dublin in the car and my father was the front seat passenger, in the back was my three year old nephew. He suddenly asks , mam , "what are the white lines in the middle of the road for?"
My father and sister both explain the reason for white lines in the middle of the road.
There is silence in the back.
a couple of minutes later the nephew pipes up "but what happens when it snows"?
Overheard by tappers, off me skin and blister
Posted on Sunday, 03rd September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (220) | Comments (2) | Email to a friend |
How big are bungalowes?
Was upstairs on the 77 bus into town, two blokes out of their heads sitting at the back mouthing out of them...
"Only back from Kilkenny man, Johnny's stag party"
The other one "ahh deadly man, I was in Kilkenny before man, whereabouts did ye stay"....
"we stayed in a bungalow man"...
"Are them gaffs big man?"....
"Bleeding huge..." loud sniff "It was nearly 3 storeys high"
Overheard by ChoppersX, 77 bus
Posted on Sunday, 03rd September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (199) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
The Amnesty Ambush
I had the privilege of going down to work one day on the right side of O'Connell St where the infamous Amnesty team greet us all to help charities in need. Ahead of me, there were a flock of D4 girls. So there I was just waiting for something stupid to happen.
D4 Girl #1: "Oh my god loike, it's the Amnesty Ambush loike"
D4 Girl #2: "Yeah I know it's like aaaaagh"
D4 Girl #1: "I mean loike honestly, can't they just figure out that they are sooo like glorified homeless people?"
Guess they won't be giving any of their Daddy's cash in anytime soon!
Overheard by Anonymous, Outside Kylemore, walking down O Connell ST.
Posted on Sunday, 03rd September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (160) | Comments (2) | Email to a friend |
Cleaning Lady Wisdom
Older Cleaning Lady to Young (probably novice) Cleaning Lady, while a second Older Cleaning Lady knowingly looks on:
"What have I told ye? You control the buffer! Don't let the buffer control you!!!"
Overheard by Dave, Front Square, Trinity College
Posted on Sunday, 03rd September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (298) | Comments (2) | Email to a friend |
the crooked wall cafe
overheard a couple of Cork fans on the bus into town from South Circular Road
on seeing Darwins pub
"what did that guy Charles Darwin do again?"
"he postulated the theory of evolution"
"oh yeah"
on seeing the crooked wall cafe
"look 'the crooked wall cafe'!"
"only in Dublin!"
laughs
Overheard by Cor, on the bus into town
Posted on Monday, 04th September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (15) | Comments (2) | Email to a friend |
Welcome to Ireland
An African gets on the 83 on Westmoreland Street, flashes his travel pass at the driver and sits down.
An auld one beside me says "...and they've got the free travel as well"
Overheard by Niall, 83 bus
Posted on Monday, 04th September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (353) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Where are we?
Well overheard coming from a Dubs mouth in Edinburgh.
Girl on a hen weekend (obvious by the t-shirt) answers her phone.
"Hello. Whos dis. Oh Paul. No cant do that dat. Im in England!!"
Overheard by Sheen, Edinburgh Airport
Posted on Monday, 04th September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (188) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Anaesthesia! Bless you!
A few years ago, I had occasion to be in the casualty dept of Blanchardstown Hospital, getting a cut stiched, as was the jaysis-howaya chap in the next cubicle. He was being treated by a doctor of Asian origin, who had a very strong accent. The youngfella says to the doctor as treatment started, "eh, d'ye moind if I don' look, pal?" to which the doctor says ''Certainly''. A blood-curdling scream followed, as well as every type of expletive you can think up. After this died down, the nurse that was treating me calmly called through the curtain, "He said do you mind if I don't LOOK, not do you mind if I don't have a LOCAL!!"
Overheard by stillsick, James Connolly Hospital, A&E
Posted on Monday, 04th September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (255) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Floating punters
On Jimmy Greally's restaurant review programme on City Channel, local TV station. Head chef or someone being interviewed, says "this corner of the place is very popular. People who come in tend to levitate towards it..."
Overheard by Sheridan, On City Channel
Posted on Monday, 04th September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (122) | Comments (2) | Email to a friend |
No rest for the wicked
At Mad Cow Market on Sunday looking a DVD's on a stall when these two young skanger blokes come up to the stall. Theres another skanger behind the stall who obviously knows the new arrivals and says "So what were yez up ta today boyz, out robbin stuff?" "Yeh" replies the youngest skanger, "it is Sunday"
So much for the day of rest
Overheard by grif, Mad Cow Market
Posted on Monday, 04th September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (199) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Exceptional graffiti
Written above the urinals in Whelan's of Wexford Street:
"Rage against the Latrine - F**k you I won't piss where you tell me."
Overheard by Pat B, Wexford Street
Posted on Tuesday, 05th September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (383) | Comments (0) | Email to a friend |
Irish terror alert level
The day after the latest "terror plot" panic in Britain, my dad overheard a passenger waiting to board the ferry at Dun Laoghaire ask a harbour policeman,
"What state of alert are yis on?"
Quick as a flash the harbour policeman says, "Barely awake"
Overheard by dub, Stena terminal, Dun Laoghaire
Posted on Tuesday, 05th September 2006
|
|
|
|
|
Rating score (590) | Comments (1) | Email to a friend |
